The Origins of "Doofus"

If you have attended Big East basketball games in recent years, you have likely heard large Caucasian players on visiting teams serenaded with cheers of “doofus.” Most dictionaries do not include “doofus” as an official word, but it remains widely used in the vernacular. In the basketball sense, a doofus is best defined as a large, lumbering, white center or power forward.

The doofus phenomenon has mostly developed over the past 20 years. In the days of Bob Cousy and Jerry West, white basketball players were not considered a novelty, therefore making doofuses impossible. An important component of doofus-dom is badly sticking out amongst other players. The decline and retirement of Larry Bird was what finally made it possible for the doofus image to take hold.

It is difficult to identify an original doofus, but if we were to pinpoint the player who most put doofuses on the map, it would be former Indiana Pacer Rik Smits. Smits, a 7’ 4” native of the Netherlands, played center for the Pacers from 1988-2000. With the bulk of his career being inthe Jordan era, when baggy shorts became the norm, Smits, with his trademark high black socks, stuck out more than a New Jersey guido in Amish country. During this same time frame, we must also take note of Shawn Bradley; the man who was 7’6” and wore #76 for the 76ers, a feat that will likely never be topped.

Today, thanks to the likes of David Lee, Aaron Gray and Zydrunas Ilgauskas, the doofus brand is alive and well in the NBA. However, it is in the college game that the doofus is strongest. Several doofuses have risen to prominence in recent years; most notably UNC’s Tyler Hansbrough and Kansas’ Cole Aldrich. Doofuses ranging from star players to bench warmers fill rosters across the country, all sharing the same skill set of rebounding, inside scoring, and attracting the derision of opposing fans. Doofuses are well established throughout the sport, and are not going away anytime soon.

Where are they now? Pittsburgh doofus squad

Many college basketball fans will remember 7'0 Pitt center Aaron Gray. Fewer remember his 6'10 Canadian side kick, Levon Kendall. Together, these large, lumbering white boys brought life to the term "doofus." Gray was an All-American while at Pitt, and Kendall was most infamous for a haircut that would put Andy Rautins to shame. After graduating in 2007, Gray was selected in the NBA draft by the Chicago Bulls, and was recently traded to the New Orleans Hornets. Meanwhile, Kendall moved on to Europe, and is currently playing for Panionios of the Greek league.

An Era Comes to an End

After 11 seasons, the Eagles have traded Donovan McNabb to the Washington Redskins. McNabb, a polarizing figure as of late, leaves behind a very mixed legacy. With all due respects to Ron Jaworski and Randall Cunningham, McNabb will likely be considered the best quarterback in franchise history. Over the past decade, McNabb led the Eagles to 5 NFC East championship, and appearances in 5 NFC Championships and Super Bowl XXXIX. Despite the successes, McNabb is most remembered for his failure to win a Super Bowl. In the Super Bowl loss, as well as the 4 NFC Championship losses, McNabb often came up short when it mattered most. Sabremetricians can crunch all kinds of numbers to make McNabb look good, but those of us that actually watch the games can tell you that when McNabb would come out for a final drive while trailing in the 4th quarter, we would all just have that feeling of knowing that he wouldn't get it done. There is a certain intangible that the Montanas and Bradys of the world possess that McNabb just didn't have. The blame cannot be placed squarely on McNabb; Andy Reid's pass heavy playcalling is laughably predictable, and the Eagles defense has often had a penchant for folding in the clutch as well. However, with the game on the line and the oppurtunity there to take charge, too many times McNabb came up small.

Another much discussed issue is McNabb's love/hate relationship with Philadelphis fans. Although the booing on draft day story is completly overblown, the Eagles' selection of McNabb with the #2 pick in the 1999 draft was not well received at the time. Although greatly supported during his initial successes, more and more fans turned against McNabb every year after watching the same mistakes result in the same ending over and over again. The national media will say that the horrible mean Philadelphia fans who booed Santa Claus just didn't appreciate what they had. But we know the real story. Much is made of the Philadelphia boobird stereotype, but in reality, Philly fans do not make ridiculous demands. All we ask is that you show that you care as much as us. Every time McNabb laughed and smiled after a game changing interception or fumble, he may have thought it was all in good fun, but in reality he was laughing in the face of every long suffering Eagles fan. While the past decade of contention has been fun, we all knew inside that the Eagles would never win a Super Bowl as long as the Reid/McNabb system was in place. Does Kevin Kolb have what it takes? Will Andy Reid ever figure out how to run the ball or manage the clock? Many questions will be answered this season.

MLB Preview

After the disappointing conclusions to the NFL and NCAA seasons, and as the NHL looks set to rig the playoffs for Crosby again, let us turn our attention to the bright spot in the sports landscape; the new baseball season. Like a good sports blogger, I have provided my predictions for each division below:

AL EAST

1. Yankees
2. Red Sox (WC)
3. Rays
4. Orioles
5. Blue Jays

The defending champion Yankees, as usual field the best team money can buy. Despite the departures of Johnny Damon and Hidecki Matsui, the lineup remains stellar, and the already strong pitching rotation has been bolstered by the addition of Javier Vazquez. Someday time will catch up to ageing stars such as Derek Jeter and Mariano Rivera, but for now they are still going strong.

Although their lineup has been weakened with the departure of Jason Bay, the Red Sox added John Lackey to what was already one of the best rotations in the league, and look like a good bet to clinch the Wild Card. Tampa Bay is a talented young team and would be a strong contender in most other divisions. The Orioles have a bright future with up and coming stars such as Matt Wieters, but right now the competition in this division is just too tough. The Blue Jays traded ace Roy Halladay, and are currently in full rebuilding mode. Toronto fans will have to follow Kyle Drabek’s AAA starts to hold them over until Maple Leafs season starts again.

AL Central

1. White Sox
2. Twins
3. Tigers
4. Indians
5. Royals

The AL Central will likely be a highly competitive division, with three teams fully capable of ending up on top. If Jake Peavy remains healthy and regains the form he had with the Padres, the White Sox will have a very strong chance. With a brand new stadium and a new contract for Joe Mauer, the Twins are also looking to contend, but they have been dealt a serious blow by the season ending injury to closer Joe Nathan. After losing the 1 game tiebreaker to the Twins last year, the Tigers will be hungry as well, and are led by a legitimate ace in Justin Verlander. The Indians are in rebuilding mode, and the Royals are, well, the Royals.

AL West

1. Rangers
2. Angels
3. Mariners
4. A’s

The Rangers have a stacked lineup led by Josh Hamilton, and will be a strong contender if they get serviceable performances from their pitching staff, which will rely heavily on the frequently injured Rich Harden. It is difficult to pick against the Angels since they usually win this division, but their rotation has been greatly weakened by the departure of John Lackey. The Mariners have a solid rotation with the addition of Cliff Lee, but their lineup is still suspect, and addition of clubhouse cancer Milton Bradley is unlikely to help.

NL East

1. Phillies
2. Braves (WC)
3. Marlins
4. Mets
5. Nationals

The Phillies have won this division three years in a row, and are likely to do it again. The addition of Roy Halladay and the probable resurgence of Cole Hamels give the Phillies a powerful 1-2 punch at the front of the rotation, and the return of Placido Polanco improves a lineup that was already the best in the National League by a considerable margin. Concerns have been raised over the bullpen, but Brad Lidge was as bad as humanly possible last season and the Phillies still won the division handily.

The Braves look like the strongest competition, and are a good bet to take the Wild Card. New outfielder Jason Heyward is already the clear cut favorite to win Rookie of the Year, and is definitely a player to watch. The Marlins finished above .500 last year and are only getting better. The Nationals remain the laughing stock of the league, but Nationals fans (if they do exist, think about it, have you ever met an actual Nationals fan?) can look forward to the debut of Steven Strasburg.

Perhaps the most noteworthy event in this division is that despite signing Jason Bay, this is the first year in the Omar Minaya era that the Mets were not crowned the “best team on paper” during the off season. It was a streak almost as impressive as the Eagles’ run of salary cap championships.

NL Central

1. Cardinals
2. Brewers
3. Cubs
4. Reds
5. Astros
6. Pirates

The Cardinals resigned Matt Holliday, and as long as they Have Albert Pujols, they remain the favorite in this division. The Brewers have a strong lineup led by Prince Fielder and Ryan Braun, but their pitching is suspect. The Cubs remain bogged down by bad contracts, and the Reds remain mediocre. Its hilarious to watch the Astros run into the ground by the man that ruined my childhood, Ed Wade. Speaking of Ed Wade, perhaps the Pirates would be higher than last had they accepted his 2004 trade offer of Ryan Howard for Kris Benson (true story).

NL West

1. Rockies
2. Dodgers
3. Giants
4. Padres
5. Diamondbacks

After a late run to claim lat season’s wild card, the Rockies are the trendy pick. The Dodgers have been solid contenders the past 2 years, but when Vicente Padilla is your opening day starter, you know a team has issues. Tim Lincecum and Matt Cain keep the Giants in the conversation, but they still have a great lack of offense. The Padres (who bear a striking resemblance to Ed Wade’s old Phillie teams) and Diamondbacks are unlikely to compete.

Playoff Predictions:
AL:
Yankees over Rangers
White Sox over Red Sox
Yankees over White Sox

NL:
Phillies over Rockies
Cardinals over Braves
Phillies over Cardinals

World Series:
Phillies over Yankees